July 15, 2007 #10
As Pick N Flick and I missed the start, we missed most of the good stuff on trail, hared by Redheaded Woodpecker and Bimbo By Day. We caught up with the cycling wankers at the beer check at Riley’s Irish Pub. These folks are great, as they didn’t have a chance to properly open, however they served us anything we wanted. Just my luck, the bartender made a mistake and put alcohol in a virgin bloody mary; someone had to step in so it wouldn’t go to waste. Life is good. Arthur Gash and Tour De Bone hung out with Pick N Flick and I while the rest of the wankers left to win the hash. Pick N Flick offered to stuff their bikes in the car and auto hash to the end, however with their athletic prowess, they’d arrive biking to the finish first, anyway. The finish was at Chuy’s on 1st and Whetmore; we had a good turnout despite the typical 169 degrees Fahrenheit summer day. The awards began among chomping of chips and salsa and slurping of beer. Papa and Redheaded Woodpecker were nominated for the face-plant award. Apparently, something had happened to Papa on trail that had to do with a squirrel; I can only imagine and therefore did not ask. I figured I would be better off being spared some kind of hellish visual. Woodpecker had sordid sex-while-haring injuries; there were huge spots of road rash all over his body. Of course it was a drink-off. One of the hash shit award nominees was Appendage; as she short-cutted to the mall and went shopping for herself. She wouldn’t have been nominated if she brought back something for all of us. Master Meat Finder was nominated for sporting a mullet haircut. This nomination won’t get any of the harriers on her good side, as it is known that harrietttes in general do not like being teased about their hair, body parts, mood, or behavior. Duh! I am not sure why I was nominated, something about a sex glow; I thought that might fall under the stud award, but what do I know. Another drink-off began. Speaking of the stud award, Papa was nominated for defending the hash against a rabid squirrel. Again I did not ask, I am only assuming he “took one for the team.” Arthur Gash was nominated for his studly rubber work; I heard it had something to do with a flat tire, but I think that was a cover-up as I saw him winking at the cute bartender at Riley’s. Yoda was nominated for putting the rubber on Gash…porn doesn’t get any better than that! What are fellow hashers for, if not to help with the rubber work. Once again, I was nominated for a sex glow. Okay, now why this is noted as something different than my usual glow, I don’t know. Yoda won the award with much explaining to do to Appendage. We noted the presence of two Pedalfiles virgins, Vomit Nazi who was talked into joining our group by I Love Fat Chicks and Deep Dish; and Just Nick who was dragged to our event by Vomit Nazi. As Yoda stood up, he was nominated for a gorilla down-down for having creamed his jeans while eating chips. I want to thank Redheaded Woodpecker and Bimbo By Day for stepping in at the last moment and laying a kick-ass trail for the Pedalfiles wankers. I hear the hills were much appreciated in the furnace-like heat. The pack also rock; Flying Booger, Arthur Gash, Papa Don’t Peek, Meat Flaps, Master Meat Finder, Yoda, Appendage, Cockstalker, Deep Dish, I Love Fat Chicks, Trailing Dick, Vomit Nazi, Just Nick, Pick N Flick and Casual Friday.
Let them drink beer!
Casual Friday
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Bimbo By Day
said...
The trail started out at Chuy's and went merciless up the First Avenue hill. It then veered off to the left at a DP and continued on another roller coaster ride of hills before coming out to Oracle where it went up again.
Hashers are much better at going down then up. The turn on Roller Coaster Road was enjoyed by everyone since this direction was basically downhill , ok going down finally! Then on-into the beercheck at Reily's Irish Pub, one of the great Tucson dive bars. Not your typical Pedalfiles ride so the change was good; and there was cloud cover!
Posted July 18, 2007 04:16 PM
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Casual Friday
replied to ...
Dammit Jim! And I missed it all to ride in the comfort of Pick N Flick's pimp mobile!
Posted July 17, 2007 10:49 PM
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Flying Booger
said...
You asked for a description of the trail. Here goes:
Flat flat up up up up up up check up up up up up up up up missed check down down flat up up up up up check down down down up up up up up up up down down up up down up up up down check down down down down down down down Gash has a flat flat flat flat flat beer check. Flat flat flat flat flat flat flat flat flat flat on-in.
Posted July 17, 2007 07:35 PM
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